Half a Size Too Big, But Still An Amazing Find

I bought some groovy boots.

I'd been looking for a pair of boots like these for ages, and one day, making my usual rounds at the op shops, there were my boots. Brand new, nice quality leather, knee high, small heeled black boots. They were of the quality you don't normally find in an op shop, and I quickly tried them on and snapped them up. What a dream.

The first time I wore them, though, I found that they were slightly too big. I hadn't noticed in my initial excitement, but I could have gone with a half size smaller, if that had been an option. And, the more I wore them, the more I noticed that they were kind of hard on the bottom. I had to put insoles in to wear them around town for long.

I still think they're great shoes. I expect I'll wear them a fair number of times this upcoming Autumn and Winter. But, they're not the best shoes I've ever had. I don't think anyone else who has these same shoes has made a mistake by purchasing them. And, they're undoubtedly the perfect shoes for someone with a slightly larger foot than mine. It could be partially my fault because I don't wear thick socks in them, but that's just not my style. 

The boots, of course, are a metaphor. I mean, I do actually own these boots, but they are also a metaphor for expat blogging, of all things.

There is a certain pressure for expat bloggers to share only positives, and to present their new home in a glowing light. I write this because I know and read bloggers who have been taken to task for writing the most trivial complaints/non-glowing reviews of their home away from home in the midst of a sea of other compliments. They are told, "get over it," "try harder," "you can't expect it to be like where you are from," and my favorite, "if you don't like it, leave."

I wonder why we get defensive about the place we are from? A place is not us, nor did we do much to create the landscape and customs. Yet, I for one hate hearing outsiders say negative things about where I am from, so I understand the impulse to feel a bit red in the face and angry and the deliverer - especially if I sense a grain of truth in the message. It's a pretty curious phenomenon, if you think about it.

Just like my cool boots, I like my home. In reality, I still sometimes feel that it is half a size off for, but a surely a tailored fit for others. That doesn't mean that I hate my boots, blame my boots, think other owners of the same boots are wrong, or want to give up my boots. They give me moments of discomfort. Most things about them are great. I'm breaking them in. I'm glad I have them. 

A blog is a chronicle of an experience and, with a small handful of whingey exceptions, most of the expat bloggers I read are pleased as punch with their homes, make every effort to adapt, and do sometimes feel a little out of place. We should feel free to express that not everything is a cakewalk, that sometimes we get a little blister on our big toes. That we once had a pair of boots that fit us better. 

I know that the people who read this blog come from across a spectrum - my friends and family, other expats, people considering a move to Australia, and Australians. I write this blog because expat blogs were so important to me when I moved, and if everything was not bathed in pink ruffles, I wanted to know. That did not dissuade me from wanting to come, suggest to me that a place was bad, or hinder my experience, but was just a warning that some days may be better than others. I actually have been lucky in receiving almost exclusively positive comments on here (though the Australian culture police have swung by on the rare occasion to curtly tell me when I've said something wrong), but I have witnessed this elsewhere, and I don't care for the culture it breeds.

To the readers who might get a little put off, I say, accept the criticism for what it is - part of someone's journey, not a personal affront on you or your country. To the bloggers, I say, keep keeping it real. You are helping others understand their own journeys, wherever they may be.

I have been writing about our lovely travels lately, but want to soon get back into talking more about daily life in these pages, and I hope to have the freedom to be mostly positive, but fair and honest.

Until then, I'm the one wandering around town in the awesome boots.